The Indian Musical Comedy about Foiling a Terrorist Plot with ‘Assassin’s Creed’ Cosplay
As much as I was thrilled by the announcement that Assassin’s Creed 3 was going to take the franchise to a new setting during the American Revolution, there’s another piece of the parkour-based murderin’ game that I’ve been obsessing over even more: A scene from Velayudham, a 2011 musical action-comedy from India where the main character cosplays as Assassin’s Creed‘s Altair in order to foil a terrorist plot.
Rather than telling the story of the eternal battle between the vaguely evil Templars and a bunch of dudes who have spend a lot of time crafting their signature undetectable Hidden Blades, only to also carry around swords, knives, crossbows and the occasional gun, Velayudham — which has been gaining fame on the Internet as “The Bollywood Assassin’s Creed” — takes a slightly different route. Actor/singer Vijay stars as Velu, a milkman who inadvertently becomes a vigilante who foils terrorists in an effort to raise money for his sister’s wedding.
That’s how I understand it, anyway, and as weird as that setup and its attendant musical fight scene might be, I’d love to see something along those lines wind up in the actual games. Honestly, considering that the games as they are now involve you fistfighting the Pope while he uses his magic powers to shoot lasers at you from his staff before you go talk to the aliens in the basement of the Vatican and occasionally unlock the secret free-running courses that were built into Renaissance cathedrals, pop music martial arts comedy wouldn’t even be the third most bizarre thing about those games. Sure, there might be a few legal difficulties in getting the rights, but I have it on good authority that when it comes to those games, everything is permitted.
If nothing else, Velayudham has one distinct advantage over the games: At no time during the entire video above does it cut back to Desmond Miles in the Animus for an extended sequence that is most decidedly not about the Assassin in question.