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Cowboy Ninja Viking! How to Make Your Own Comics Mashup

Whoever arranges all the cool comic social gatherings should start planning a coming-out party for AJ Lieberman and Riley Rossmo. Last month the pair debuted with “Cowboy Ninja Viking,” a Golden Age-sized, one-color trip about a counter-intelligence operative with three distinct personalities: Cowboy, Ninja and Viking.

Pre-order numbers were so impressive, the series was expanded from a limited to an ongoing, and the reception for this odd pop adventure has been robust, to say the least. Which just goes to prove to the old wives’ tale: “Mash together three or more cool things, and you have the makings of an absolute monster of a comic.”

We’ve decided to try our hand at our own original triple mashups to test this theory, with this list of instant classics like “Mongol Cyborg Stuntman” and “Wolfman Rockstar Spy.” You, too, are, of course, encouraged to try this at home, write up a quick story synopsis, and e-mail blind submissions to every editor in the company directory at every comic book publisher even if they don’t accept submissions, because they’re lying.

You’ll need at least three cool things for each book. The coveted four-peat has been achieved, immediately resulting in apotheosis to cultural phenomenon and lifelong showering of riches (TMNT), but the unsuccessful linking of four cool elements has been known to lead to quantum hauntings, spontaneous hermaphroditism, and hammertoe. Don’t get greedy.

Mongol Cyborg Stuntman

Two thousand years ago, a rip in spacetime opened in Mongol China, dragging Genghis the Facebasher screaming into epicenter of an explosion on the set of Michael Bay’s “Big Explosions II.” Using his considerable resources, Bay rebuilds Genghis with leftover parts from homemade Transformer snuff films, and trains the erstwhile pillager to become the greatest stuntman of all time, known for his daring jumps and lifelike self-dismemberments.


Detective Shaman Princess

Thirty-year man Ray McNulty has seen it all. Or so he thinks. One day before retirement, he catches the call that will change his life, one that leads him to be possessed by the thousand-year-old spirit of Mother Clutch, medicine woman and first daughter of the Star People of what is now Shaker Heights, NJ. Now, armed with her animal totems and the ancestral knowledge of her people, nothing’s gonna stop her from taking her streets back. Also, her partner’s a lesbian.

Wolfman Rockstar Spy

Ten years ago, Bucket of Bolts lead singer Sam Samdersson had a run-in with a werewolf on the Scottish moors. Lucky for him, Sir Winston Seymour Headworm Gruber-Ellis of MI-6 was on the tail of that werewolf and took the canine crooner in, teaching him the life of a sexually ambiguous British superspy. And the rest, as they say, is stuff that has already happened and is part of the human record.

Goth Centaur Spaceman

Pretty self-explanatory, don’t you think? Android Witch Linebacker Pale-skinned artificial teen Minerva Sink dresses only in black, hangs out with social outcasts, and “casts spells” at anyone who crosses her. But thanks to her creator’s engineering genius and inappropriately sexual love of football, she also has an eye for the screen, practically lives in the backfield, and brings the pain like a freakin’ truck. “Snot bubbles, bitch,” she intones, accessing her memory banks to cast a hex on her felled victim. Snot bubbles indeed.

Indian Pegasus Assassin

Jeff Running Cloud has been killing pegasus ever since one trampled his father in the Great Inter-Species Dance Marathon of Birth-Cycle Ninety-Three. “Not ’til I kill every last one,” he thinks, fingering the wings that he is unaware makes him half-pegasus. Something’s amiss in Glennbeckville.

Mermaid Soldier Spaceman

College freshman Kenny Caufield has only thirty minutes to get a costume together for the Halloween party, and pickings at the Kum & Go are spare. Lucky for Caufield, he’s a high-functioning autistic, and the gentle application of a little imagination, a can of tuna, some Tang, and the forceful removal of the clerk’s now-bloody .38 lays down the pavement on the road to magic town.

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