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Love Hurts: ‘What Will Happen When He Sees Me — Like THIS?’

As we head towards Valentine’s Day, ComicsAlliance is offering up a daily tribute to love, as depicted in the somewhat dubious world of Romance Comics! Today’s entry: Teen Age Romance #86′s “He Never Even Noticed!”

In the world of Romance Comics, even something as simple as a trip to the optometrist can lead directly to crushing heartbreak. Or at least, that’s what happens in this five-pager from 1962 by Stan “The Man” Lee and the King of Comics, Jack Kirby.

That’s right, folks: They knocked this one out between the issues of Fantastic Four that defined comic books as we know them today.

Young Vera — a surprisingly popular name in these stories that I have never actually heard in real life — is looking forward to a date where she’s sure to be pinned by her boyfriend Bob, presumably right after he delivers a Stone Cold Stunner. Unfortunately, her plans for her special night are ruined when she’s diagnosed with astigmatism!

Despite her mother’s insistence that she’s at least working with a set of attractive frames, Vera is inconsolable — and you would be too, if your doctor just shoved a pair of glasses onto your face while you sat there in cross-eyed shock. For Vera, though, it’s more the fear that her new status as a four-eyed freak with demonstrably inferior genes is going to send Bob running for the hills. It might seem silly now, but keep in mind that this was 50 years ago, and the concept of the Sexy Librarian had only barely been invented.

Fortunately for Vera, Bob isn’t nearly as superficial as she suspects:

So take heart, young ladies! Remember that it’s not what you look like that matters, just as long as there’s a man who thinks you’re attractive.

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