Parting Shot: ‘The Girl Who Knew the Torment of Believing She Could Never Get Married’

As we head towards Valentine's Day, ComicsAlliance is offering up a daily tribute to love, as depicted in the somewhat dubious world of Romance Comics! Today's entry: Girl Confessions #13's "I Can't Get Married!"

Oh, relax, they don't mean, you know, at the same time. Instead, the love Mille feels in this tale of woe from 1951 is more of a split between courtly pining from afar and an admiration for Rennie's healthy fiber intake:

Unfortunately for Millie, she's laboring under the impression that her sister Rena is in love with Rennie, based on the simple fact that they go out together all the time. As it turns out, though, they're just hanging out and doing whatever the early-50s equivalent of Gears of War co-op was (smoking and keeping an eye out for commies), and by the time Rena lets Millie know, Rennie's already been shipped off to go fight in a war.

But she stays true even through proposals from other boys, and when Rennie gets home after three years, she's welcomed into the open arms of the man she loves. So take heart, young lovers: If you've ever screwed things up with the one you love, just send them off to get shot at for a few years. By comparison, your flaws won't seem so bad.