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Bizarro Back Issues

Bizarro Back Issues: Malibu’s Ultraviolent ‘Street Fighter’ Comic (1992)

Street Fighter, Malibu Comics

I've never been good at playing fighting games, but when I was growing up, there were few things in this world I loved more than Street Fighter. I think I've mentioned this before, but my first memory of actually trying to make a comic was when I was ten years old and I drew the junkyard fight scene from Batman #425 and replaced the bad guys with Blanka and Dhalsim, and really, you can draw a pretty straight line from that to where I am today. I've even written a tiny little bit of Street Fighter comics myself, and I am still very much a person who thinks karate guys throwing fireballs at each other is the highest form of art.

Of course, they didn't exactly make it easy for us to like Street Fighter back then. The games were great, sure, but if you wanted a little more story about it on this side of the Pacific, your options were pretty slim. There was the movie in 1994, and the cartoon that was somehow a sequel to it, but if you wanted to see those characters in comics, you had only one choice: Malibu's Street Fighter --- the comic so legendarily rough that it was canceled after three issues with an apology from the publisher.

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Filed Under: , Category: Humor, Opinion

Bizarro Back Issues: And Then There Was The Time Judge Dredd Fought Stan Lee (1986)

Judge Dredd: Complete Casefiles v.11

When I'm looking for something to read, there are certain things that will make me pick up a book immediately. It's probably the same way with you, and while I think we all have the usual soft spots for a favorite villain or a cool plot point, every now and then you run across a story title that's just so weird that you absolutely have to see how it all plays out. This, for the record, is the reason for about 90% of my back issue purchases, and was basically the leading theory on how to design a DC Comics cover for about thirty years.

What I'm getting at here is that when I was looking at the stories included in the new Judge Dredd Complete Casefiles v.10 paperback and I saw that there was one called "The Fists of Stan Lee," I pretty much dropped everything so that I could read it. And yes: It is, in fact, Judge Dredd fighting Stan Lee. Just, you know. Not that Stan Lee.

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Bizarro Back Issues: The Arkham Asylum Softball Team (1994)

Showcase 94 #4, DC Comics

Since the last installment of the Bizarro Back Issues column was a request explaining one of those memorable Silver Age covers that only got weirder once you cracked it open and read the actual story, I thought it might be a good idea to see if there were any other comics people had always wondered about. I put out the call, and to be honest, the last thing I expected was to find out about something I'd never heard of before, but then @saintwalker88 suggested a story that I knew would be amazing before I even read it.

Because this is the story of the Arkham Asylum Softball Team and their game against Blackgate Prison.

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Bizarro Back Issues: Batman Plays ‘Killer’s Roulette!’ (1972)

Detective Comics #426, DC Comics

Earlier this week, Matt Maxwell posted the cover of Detective Comics #426 on the always-fantastic Intrapanel Tumblr, and ever since, I've gotten a a few people asking just what exactly is going on in that story. It makes sense that they would, too -- as Maxwell quite rightly points out, it's one of the best examples of the "I Have Got To See What's Happening In This Story" school of cover design that served DC so well in the Silver and Bronze Age.

Still, as much as those comics usually made the reader ask questions, very few of them went as far as having Batman sitting there holding a loaded gun to his head with a suicide note, apparently getting ready to blow his own head off. It's a hell of a cover, but as you might expect, it's not exactly what happens in the actual story. It turns out, what happens there is even weirder.

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Love Hurts: The Greatest Romance In Comics History Is Lois Lane… And Satan

Lois Lane #103, DC Comics

I love Lois Lane so much. She's arguably the single greatest love interest in the history of comics, and like so many readers, I can't really get enough of her long-running love story with... uh, that guy. Jeez, it's on the tip of my tongue. What's his name. You know, he has the red cape, his name starts with an S, he's got powers far beyond those of mortal men? Oh! That's right: Satan.

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Love Hurts: The Listening Heart Thinks Your Feelings Are Stupid (1965)

Secret Hearts #105, DC Comics

While my favorite superheroes are pretty well-known, I've always had a soft spot for the weird, minor and exceptionally obscure comic book characters, too. There's something about those goofy little weirdos that only show up a few times that always grab my attention, and this week, as we head towards Valentine's Day, I think I have found a new favorite: Amy Ames, The Listening Heart!

Amy appeared in the mid-60s in the pages of DC's Secret Hearts as an advice columnist who would sort out her readers' heartbreaks and occasionally find a few herself, and I'll be honest with you, folks, those stories are not really that great. They do, however, feature scenes where Amy just tells a bunch of teenagers that their feelings are stupid, and that is a romance comic plot I can get behind.

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Bizarro Back Issues: Betty Cooper Sells Her Soul To The Devil To Make Out With Archie (1962)

Mr. Inferno, Archie Comics

The last year or so of Archie comics has been defined by one thing: the supernatural. Not only did we get Afterlife With Archie, which saw Sabrina the Teenage Witch dabbling in necromancy and inadvertently bringing about a zombie apocalypse that saw Jughead ripping out throats at a school dance, but it was so popular that we got a separate ongoing series about Sabrina dealing with the Lovecraftian horrors that result from witchcraft.

To the casual reader, this might seem like it's a pretty big departure from the usual Archie storylines about sharing milkshakes and having too many dates to the movies, but those of us who really know Archie Comics know that it's been there all along. Or, at the very least, it's been there since 1962, in that story where Betty Cooper literally sold her soul to the Devil so that she could make out with Archie.

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Bizarro Back Issues: Batman’s Deadly New Year! (1972)

newyear01

Last week, one of the questions that came in for my Ask Chris column came from someone who was curious about how Batman celebrated New Year's Eve, and really, that's a pretty interesting question. I mean, we have plenty of comics, cartoons and even one goofy-ass movie about how he spends Christmas, but stories that address whether or not he watches the ball drop and toasts a cup of kindness are significantly harder to come by. Fortunately, we have Batman #247, a classic from the Bronze Age that addresses exactly this question.

As it turns out, Batman spends his New Year's Eve punching out criminals. What the hell did you think he was going to do?

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Bizarro Back Issues: Donald Duck and the Tear-Harvesting Christmas Witch (1948)

duck10

Last week, I mentioned that Lost in the Andes, Fantagraphics' amazing new book Donald Duck stories by Carl Barks, had one of the weirdest Christmas stories I've ever read. And for me, that's saying something: Christmas comics are one of the few things I go out of my way to collect regardless of who the creators are and who puts them out. I love the darn things, and over the years, I've read hundreds of 'em, going back through my favorites every year.

And even with all that, The Golden Christmas Tree might just take the fruitcake. After alll, most of the other Christmas stories I've read don't involve a harvest of tears or someone turning into a woodchipper.

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Bizarro Back Issues: Donald Duck In ‘A Christmas For Shacktown’ (1952)

shacktown01

If you're a regular ComicsAlliance reader, then you already know that I'm pretty fascinated by the weirder comics of the past, but at Christmastime, my thoughts turn to more heartwarming tales. As soon as that calendar flips over to December, 'tis the season for Santa Claus, presents, the occasional talking Christmas tree that Wonder Woman rescued from the Nazis by holding a door shut and talking about how it felt like being spanked. I mean, yeah, they're still pretty weird, but they've got that Christmas spirit!

Case in point: "A Christmas For Shacktown," the title story in the latest Fantagraphics collection of Disney Duck tales by the legendary Carl Barks. At 32 pages, it's a sprawling epic (By Barks' standards, anyway) that hits those beautiful Holiday themes of altruism and the spirit of giving. Although to be fair, it does get a little closer to cannibalism than most other Christmas comics.Our story begins as Donald Duck's three nephews, Huey, Dewey and Louie, are taking a shortcut home from school through Shacktown, the hard-luck side of Duckburg where Calisota's poor gather together in sub-Dickensian poverty. Now, you'd think that a city built around the most successful businessman in the history of the world would be prosperous enough that even the bad neighborhoods would be doing all right, but apparently McDuck industries isn't the proven job creator that you might expect. If I had to guess, I'd say it's probably because its owner keeps three cubic acres of cash in a gigantic bin on top of a nearby hill, but I'm no economist. That's a different Chris Sims.

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