Listen, I've been reading comic books a long time, and if there's one thing I've learned, it's that if you want a package to get to its destination safely, the absolute last person you want handling it is Spider-Man. Best case scenario -- best case, mind you -- is that it's going to be crushed when he stops to fight the Rhino. Worst case? Incinerated by a pumpkin bomb and then thrown off a bridge. Just ask Aunt May's last 51 birthday cakes.

And yet, he is the hero that The United States Postal Service has turned to for an ad tying into the upcoming The Amazing Spider-Man 2, set to hit theaters this summer with more of Spidey's adventures in a universe where people actually use Bing. Check it out below, and be advised there's a special twist ending!

 

 

And really, who didn't see that one coming.

While it's weird to think that Stan Lee has taken a job as a movie theater projectionist, it's worth noting that he has a long-standing relationship with the post office. Lee, a dedicated method actor, does an incredible amount of preparation for his cameos in Marvel films. For The Amazing Spider-Man, for instance, he earned a Masters degree in Library Science from NYU, and for his small role as mail carrier Willie Lumpkin in Fantastic Four, he spent a year delivering mail in New York City.*

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 is out on May 2. USPS Priority Mail flat-rate boxes are, one assumes, already available at your local post office.

*: None of this is true.