The Comic Movie Trailer You’ve Been Waiting For: “MARMADUKE”
With all the excitement over yesterday’s release of the “Scott Pilgrim vs. The World” trailer yesterday hot on the heels of the “Iron Man 2″ trailer, the wonderful world of sequential art has been wondering what could possibly come along to top it. And now we know:
There’s just so much awfulness going on here that I don’t even know where to begin, not the least of which being that it’s a movie based on Marmaduke, which as I understand it is a one-panel gag comic about a giant, poorly drawn dog that terrorizes its neighborhood in the least amusing ways possible. Probably best to just take it in order:
0:01: The Intro, which might as well have just been Owen Wilson saying “Hey everybody, Owen Wilson here. I decided I wanted to buy a fourteenth car, so get ready for a little thing I like to call Grandma Comedy!”
0:20: See what happens when you don’t watch “Pushing Daisies?” Lee Pace has to go and make movies like this.
0:22: I’m going to go ahead and guess that “MARMADUKE, NOOOOOOO!” is going to be said in this movie eighty, ninety times.
0:30: Hey, it’s George Lopez, continuing his trend of starring in terrible movies about talking dogs that began in 2008’s “Beverly Hills Chihuahua.”
0:34: Really? A reference to “The OC,” a television show that’s been off the air for three years, and yet is still too fresh to be relevant to anyone who could possibly care about “Marmaduke?”
All right, I can’t take anymore. But feel free to bask in the horror and be amazed as every time you think it’s reached its lowest point, it drops down just a little further.