Bandai Has Rendered All Furniture Obsolete With An (Almost) Life-Sized Snorlax Plush Doll

It was only a few days ago, when we found out about the upcoming toys being released to celebrate Pokémon's 20th anniversary this year, that I mentioned that my ideal piece of Pokémemorabilia would be a life-sized Snorlax that I could sleep on. Now, on the eve of the Pokéversary, it seems as though the skies have parted and Arceus Himself has descended from His throne in Heaven (and/or a small ball carried by a very determined ten year-old) to grant my wish.

That's right, everybody: Throw your armchair in the trash and witness Bandai's greatest creation: A Snorlax plush doll that stands over five feet tall, coming this August to block roads, scarf down berries, and generally be the single greatest thing anyone has ever owned.

If you're not familiar with Snorlax, first of all, what are you even doing with your life. Secondly, he's basically the Brock Lesnar of Pokémon: EAT, SLEEP, HYPER BEAM, REPEAT. He is the best, and I identify with his desire to eat his body weight in apples and then pass out in the middle of the street more than I can ever say.

Amazingly, even at 4'11", the plush Snorlax isn't quite life sized. As we all know from the Pokédex, the genuine article stands at a towering 6'11" and weighs in at a slim, trim, buff, tough, ripped and jacked 1,014 pounds. Still, unless they're planning on releasing one with the exact dimensions of a king-sized mattress, I feel like this is as close to the genuine article as we're going to get.

Snorlax is up for pre-sale now in Japan for about $450, but whether it will be available on this side of the Pacific remains to be seen. I can confirm, however, that if and when it is, they have at least one sale guaranteed.

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