Welcome to Cast Party, the feature that imagines a world with even more live action comic book adaptations than we currently have, and comes up with arguably the best casting suggestions you’re ever going to find for the movies and shows we wish could exist. Today, we're looking at X-Force, Marvel's paramilitary mutant team, specifically the original version by Rob Liefeld and Fabian Nicieza.
There's been talk of a possible X-Force movie for a while, but it's hard to know what version of the team it will resemble, if it ever even gets made. For this imaginary production, we're sticking as close as possible to Liefeld and Nicieza's original vision. This isn't a movie that's going to aim for realism. This is a movie about big muscles, big guns, and action movie dialogue that's exaggerated to the point of being surreal. Let Justin Lin direct it. It's either him or Michael Bay, and nobody wants Michael Bay.
Triple H as Cable
Showing some age on his face? Check. Huge and jacked? Check. Has a voice that will sound amazing spouting badass over-the-top Liefeld dialogue? OH YEAH. Get this man a white wig and some enormous guns.
Lucy Liu as Domino
Speaking of badass, Lucy Liu's been the queen for a long time now, and she'll bring just the right credibility to Domino.
Josh Hutcherson as Cannonball
You may not know this, but Hutcherson is actually from Kentucky. Like most actors, he's largely gotten rid of his native dialect, but I'm betting he can bring it back with a vengeance to play Cannonball.
Evan Rachel Wood as Boom Boom
Wood radiates strength beyond her age and size, which makes her perfect for this version of Boom Boom.
Tatanka Means as Warpath
Tatanka Means is a promising actor with a shortage of good roles available in Hollywood. Warpath is a character who needs some rehabilitation. I'd be interested to see where Means takes him.
Naya Rivera as Feral
I'm of the belief that if you're going to play a cat person, it helps to have a background in dance. Rivera, formerly of Glee, has that plus a talent for snarling.
Tyler Breeze as Shatterstar
Who better to play a glam boy who knows how to fight than NXT's Prince Pretty?
Terry Crews as G.W. Bridge
In retrospect, I'm amazed there's a character named G. W. Bridge. But I think we can all agree he's pretty much Terry Crews in a white wig.
Triple H as Stryfe
You have to admit, he has the right look for the part.
Gran Akuma as Gideon
Gideon is muscular, immortal, kind of strange looking, and doesn't have much in the way of hair. Akuma, to my knowledge, is not immortal, but he's got the other stuff down.
Chavo Guerrero Jr as Kane
Look, I just reread these issues, and I can barely tell you anything about Kane. He's good looking (for a Liefeld character), he has brown skin, and he will hit you really hard. So let's give it to Chavo. Why not?