
‘SHATNERQUAKE’ — A Novel of Many Shatners
With a name like 'Shatnerquake' and the tagline 'William Shatner? William Shatner. William Shatner!' it's not hard to imagine what you're going to get out Jeff Burk's fanfictiony action novel, and whether or not you want it. The story begins with Shatner attending the fictional Shatnercon where the famous characters he has played -- Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, etc. -- come to life and try to kill him. Then the Bruce Campbell fans show up, and things really get crazy.
Shatner turned to face Kirk and raised the bat'leth. Kirk looked around and grabbed a black tube from another table... His thumb found a button on the side. Instantly a red beam shot out into the fanboy's stomach. He let go. Kirk raised the tube and the beam sliced neatly through the fanboy. He fell to his knees as his copious intestines unraveled onto the floor.
Kirk turned around and marveled at the laser-sword as the fanboy tried to put his guts back in.
"Oh s---, Captain Kirk's got a lightsaber," someone yelled.
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