Darth Vader Should Always Have A Crossbow
The greatness of an action figure can often be measured by its accessories. An expertly crafted array of weaponry can transform a dully sculpted figure into a worthwhile collectible, while dopey-looking add-ons could make a toy seem laughable.
A new top ten list over at Cracked is focusing on the poorer end of the action figure accessory spectrum. The list pokes its figurative finger at the ridiculousness of the Flash requiring a motorcycle (a valid complaint) and Peter Parker’s many athletic incarnations in the bizarre “Spider-Man Adventure Hero” collection, among other grievances.
Still, the list leaves something to be desired. After all, the list’s top honor – or dishonor, I suppose – is bestowed upon Crossbow Darth Vader, which I’ll admit I have never heard of before. While I can’t comment on the accessory itself, I definitely have an issue with the idea that Vader wielding a crossbow is lame.
Uh, exactly how is that lame!?
Vader force-choking some rebel scum, then tossing his lightsaber at another dude, all while firing a crossbow into some other jabroni sounds like an amazing combination to me. In fact, maybe Vader could even come up with some sort of lightsaber/crossbow hybrid. That would terrifically cool.
Ultimately, it boils down to two simple truths: 1) Darth Vader is awesome and 2) crossbows are also awesome. I cannot fathom how anybody could find a fault in these two forces colliding.
Plus, we all know that Monster Armor Wolverine has the worst accessories of all time. It’s really not even close.