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FunkyWatch: September’s Most Depressing ‘Funky Winkerbean’ And ‘Crankshaft’ Strips

FunkyWatch

Over the past 40 years, Tom Batiuk’s Funky Winkerbean has transitioned from a gag-a-day comic strip about a high school to an ongoing chronicle of pure, abject misery. Thanks to the commentary on Josh Fruhlinger’s Comics Curmudgeon, I am now completely obsessed with it, which is why I spend a little time every month rounding up its finest examples of crushing despair.

After last month hit rock bottom with the worst Funky Winkerbean strips on record, I was dreading diving into September's offerings even more than usual. That said, it seems like Batiuk has decided to take the month off from pure despair, instead taking a hard left turn into a set of comics that make absolutely no sense. Unless you count the one where an elderly woman is so frustrated with her neighbors that she literally renounces God, I mean. That one could really go either way.

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Just The Tips: Master Your Genitals With 23 Pages Of Fraction & Zdarsky’s Guide To Sexing [NSFW]

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If you've been reading Matt Fraction and Chip Zdarsky's Sex Criminals (and honestly, I'm pretty sure that if you're reading this, you are), then you've probably noticed that one of the best parts of the comic comes in the letters page where the two creators offer the reader tips for a better sex life. Wait, no. "Better" is probably not the right word. Oh well, you get the idea.

Either way, the tips have been very enthusiastically received, and with the success of Sex Criminals, Fraction and Zdarsky are looking to spread the word and penetrate the market by collecting them in Just The Tips a handsome, 96-page hardcover that will look great on your coffee table, or hastily thrown under the sofa when your parents visit. And just in case that doesn't arouse your interest, we've got a massive 23-page preview of the tips and sex positions ready for your perusal.

Please be advised, though, this is extremely not safe for work, unless your work is 100% cool with drawings of boners and buttholes, in which case you probably work for ComicsAlliance and saw it already.

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DC’s Newest Heroines Olive & Maps Get The Grand Tour In ‘Gotham Academy’ #1 [Preview]

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Becky Cloonan, Brenden Fletcher and Karl Kerschl's Gotham Academy is the comic I never knew I wanted until it was announced, and every moment since then has been an eternity of waiting for it to actually hit shelves. Now, with the book set for release this Wednesday, we are finally on the verge of living in a world where there is a high school adventure drama that also has Batman in it.

If, however, you can't wait, then I have some good news. Today, DC released a five-page preview of the new series, in which our lead characters, Olive SIlverlock and Maps Mizoguchi, take a tour of the ominous and imposing Gotham Academy, before immediately being caught in an equally ominous and imposing thunderstorm. Because of course there's a thunderstorm; heavy rain and blood-red skies are the only two types of weather allowed in Gotham City.

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The X-Men Episode Guide 5×07: Storm Front, Part One

X-Men 5x07: Storm Front Part One

The early ’90s were spoiled for choice when it came to comic book adaptations. Not only was Batman: The Animated Series on the air, but X-Men led Marvel’s push to get on the small screen, diving right into the often convoluted continuity of everyone’s favorite mutants, luring in a generation of fans, and paving the way for cartoons to follow. That’s why we’ve set out to review every single episode of the ’90s X-Men animated series.

This week, it's that adaptation of X-Men Annual #3 that you wanted. What's that? Well, somebody wanted it.

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The Marvel Comics Connection To Super Sentai And Power Rangers [Video]

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You may have already noticed that I'm a pretty big fan of going really deep into the origins and minutiae of my favorite characters. That's one of the reasons that I really appreciate what ToyBountyHunters has been doing with their in-depth series on the origins of the massive, long-running Super Sentai series, the franchise that gave us the source material for our American Power Rangers. They spend a lot of time discussing the origins and development of the series, an as someone who really likes that stuff, it's fascinating.

The same goes for their latest video, the third part of their retrospective, where they turn their attention to the connection between Marvel Comics and the development of Super Sentai -- and while I already knew all about the tokusatsu series about Spider-Man -- known colloquially as Japanese Spider-Man -- there's a lot in there that I wasn't familiar with, like how Battle Fever J started out as a Captain America show.

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Ask Chris #213: A Brief History Of The Wrath Of God

Ask Chris #213: The Spectre, art by Erica Henderson

Q: Just re-read Gotham Central and it got me wondering, what's the deal with the Spectre? -- @BatIssues

A: The Spectre was originally created in 1940 by Jerry Siegel and Bernard Baily, but it's worth noting that some sources -- including legendary editor Roy Thomas, who's about as big a fan of DC's Golden Age titles as you're likely to find -- give Siegel full credit for the whole concept, and that's the first interesting point. After all, Siegel is, as you may have heard, the co-creator of arguably the most enduring and significant character in comics history, who's known for his incredible physical strength: Slam Bradley.

Oh, and also Superman, I guess.

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Texas Preacher Declares ‘Vampire Knight’ Manga, Dried Roses To Be Satanic Works, Is Literally Villain From ‘Footloose’

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Censorship is a serious issue. It's one of the reasons that we here at ComicsAlliance always show our support to organizations like the Comic Book Legal Defense Fund and rally behind creators who have been subjected to governmental restrictions on their work.

Occasionally, though, there are incidents of people pushing to get books banned that slide right past concerning and directly into the world of hilarious ineptitude.

Such is the case with Reverend Phillip Missick of Texas's amazingly named King of Saints Tabernacle Church, who pushed for the Cleveland, TX public library to remove manga like Matsuri Hino's Vampire Knight from its library, owing, of course, to it being a demonic product of Satan that would drag otherwise saintly children directly into the gaping maw of Hell itself. That, of course, is nothing new. What makes it amazing is that he didn't stop there, going so far as to declare pretty much everything around the manga to be the product of Satan, including a few Harry Potter toys, a bouquet of dried roses, and the actual room itself to be "occultic and demonic."

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I Didn’t Mean To Kill All Your Friends But At Least The List Was Short: ‘Copra’ #17 Is One Of The Best Issues Of The Year

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Listen: Michel Fiffe's Copra is great. If you've been reading ComicsAlliance for any significant amount of time -- or even if you've just been listening to the Every Story Ever segments on the War Rocket Ajax podcast where we've ranked it above stuff like "Robin Dies At Dawn," JLA: Year One and Grant Morrison's first arc on New X-Men -- then you already know that.

But at the same time, you could be forgiven for thinking that maybe, after that first run of twelve amazing DIY comics, Fiffe might've slipped a bit. After all, it's pretty rare for something to stay that good forever, and now that Fiffe's picking up mainstream work from Marvel in the pages of All New Ultimates and Dynamite with Captain Victory, you'd have a good reason to think that Copra would be on the back burner. But if you did, you would be wrong.

If, for whatever reason, you haven't been reading the second act of Copra, where Fiffe turns his attention to spotlighting individual members of the team, then you're missing out on some of the most amazing comics of the year -- and the latest issue, where Fiffe drops a treatise on and rejection of Randian objectivisim in the form of a story about a superhero sent to an interdimensional prison, is the best of the bunch by far.

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Filed Under: , , Category: Indie, Opinion, Reviews

Nerdist’s ‘Talent Agency’ Short Beats The Odds: Two Funny Superhero Sketches In A Row [Video]

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Comedy sketches about superheroes tend to be a pretty mixed bag. We know, they're sent to us each time one emerges from the ether. So believe us, we're as surprised as you are that the good people over at Nerdist have managed to knock out two in a single month that are pretty hilarious. Hot on the heels of a short about Batman's parents not actually being dead comes "STA: Superhero Talent Agency," which imagines a world where heroes have agents to get them endorsement deals and television appearances, and just what exactly that requires.

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Filed Under: , Category: Humor, Video

The Top Ten Worst Haircuts In Superhero Comics

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If there's one thing we've learned from our years on the Internet, it's that there's no aspect of comics that can't be broken down and quantified in a single definitive list, preferably in amounts of ten. And since there's no more definitive authority than ComicsAlliance, we're taking it upon ourselves to compile Top Ten Lists of everything you could ever want to know about comics.

This week, we're taking a look back on the many mullets bowl-cuts and other assorted disasters with the ten worst haircuts in superhero comic history!

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