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Three Different Groups Of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle-Themed Wrestlers Are Feuding With Each Other In Mexico

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The world of pro wrestling can be a beautiful thing. For proof, you need look no further than the recent developments in lucha libre, in which there are not one, not two, but three different groups of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle-themed factions that have recently begun warring with each other. I can only assume this conflict was inevitable, but it came to a head when AULL’s Tortiguillos Karatekas were taking on the IWRG’s Tortugas Ninja in a four-on-four tag team match that was interrupted when a third faction, Las Tortugas Mutantes, ran in and started attacking everyone.

Fortunately the world, this was caught on video, and yes: Four Ninja Turtles simultaneously suplex four other Ninja Turtles in a strong contender for the greatest moment in the history of the King of Sports. How were there empty seats in that arena?

Wrestling being wrestling, it was announced that the three groups of Technicos and Rudos In A Half Shell (along with a fourth faction, Los Bastardos, which WithSpandex’s Jessica Hudnall accurately described as being four dudes no one cares about because they are not Ninja Turtles) will be facing each other in a sixteen-man/mutant/turtle tag-team match in the future.

Personally, my money is on Las Tortugas Ninjas, because they also have the guidance of a costumed Splinter, but at this point it’s anybody’s guess what might happen when the four teams clash. Will Tokka and Rahzar make their presence felt? Will six-time World Champion Kevin Nash reprise his role as Super Shredder? Will we finally get the event foretold by this action figure from 1991?


Shell Slammin Mike


Only time will tell.

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