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Rhode Island Declares Today ‘G.I. Joe Day,’ Narrowly Dodges COBRA Retaliation

Earlier today, Rhode Island Governor Donald L. Carcieri declared today G.I. Joe Day in his state during a widely attended event at the Rhode Island State House. Carcieri was joined by Hasbro President and CEO Brian Goldner as he made the declaration in front of a crowd of gathered G.I. Joe fans and prospective attendees of the 17th Annual G.I. Joe Convention, which kicks off this weekend.

“We are excited to have the G.I. Joe brand and its many legions of fans come to Providence for its annual convention this year,” Carcieri said at the event, during which an army of 250 G.I. Joe action figures parachuted down from the upper level of the State House. “We are proud to have such an internationally iconic hero call Rhode Island home.”

To which I say – people of Rhode Island, you just dodged a lethal (red) laser beam.Your governor very nearly sentenced you all to death today by announcing an officially sanctioned G.I. Joe Day*, a day that would most likely be referred to by Cobra forces as Kill All G.I. Joe Loyalists And Steal Their Children Day. Seriously, if hosting a G.I. Joe Convention in your capital isn’t dangerous enough, painting your entire state with a veritable bull’s eye for Viper Pilots ala “Red Dawn” is just pure madness. Shame on you, Governor Carcieri.

Of course, the convention isn’t over, so if you’re in Rhode Island this weekend and you hear shouts of “Cobra-la-la-la-la-la” followed promptly by blue laser blasts, run in the opposite direction.

[Source: Toy News International]

(* = Alright, fine, G.I. Joe Day sounds kind of cool. Enjoy the convention, you lucky Rhode Islanders.)

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