In a big year for comic book characters on the big screen, none were bigger or more swoonsome than Christopher Michael Pratt, the swaggering prince of twinkle-eyed handsomeness who brought boring 70s obscurity Star-Lord to thrilling, sexually stimulating life in this year's Guardians Of The Galaxy, and briefly made us feel alive again in this numbing, disconnected modern hellscape of free wi-fi and gluten free brownies.
As is our long-standing tradition here at ComicsAlliance, we name a "sexiest man alive" every year without fail. Previous winners include Harry Hamlin, Mark Harmon, and two-time winner Namor McKenzie. This year there was never any doubt that our winner was going to be Peter Quill himself, Chris Pratt. Because Chris Hemsworth was in literally nothing. NOTHING. Sometimes it's really hard to get out of bed, you know?
As a man who reads superhero comics, I confess that I share a commonly-held prurient interest in big-chested, long-legged heroes in skin-baring costumes that barely cover their naughty bits -- or as I like to call him, Namor.
Sadly, Namor is pretty much alone in his category. Contrary to the perception that male heroes in comics are frequently sexually objectified, it's my experience that even Namor is only rarely presented as someone to lust over. Yet I'm fortunate that my tastes run towards the Hemsworth end of the scale. Like many straight men, I admire the kind of buff dudes that are the staple of superhero comics, even though they are rarely sexualized. If I shared the tastes of most of the women I know, I think I'd find superhero comics an even more frustratingly sexless wasteland.
2011 was a good year for superhero beefcake. Not in comics, of course, but at the movies. And not in terms of quantity, but in terms of quality. What I'm saying is that Chris Hemsworth took his shirt off in Thor, and it was great.
All right, Chris Evans took his shirt off as well for his Charles-Atlas-ification in Captain America, and I understand Ryan Reynolds was briefly featured in his scanties before having his body replaced with a cantaloupe-skinned wire-frame in Green Lantern. That was it, though. The bar for superhero beefcake is set pretty low. And the bar is set low because the source material -- actual superhero comics -- has never been fertile ground for the shameless sexual objectification of men.
Do you want a strong, muscled, he-man body like the god of thunder, mighty Thor? If you can't find an uru hammer to transform yourself into an Asgardian powerhouse, you need the June 2011 issue of Men's Fitness UK, which spotlights "The Thor Workout."In the illustrated article, Chris He
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