It takes almost toxic levels of suspension of disbelief to make it through the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot, the fifth and worst entry in the film franchise based on the pop culture phenomenon originally created by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird. That suspension of disbelief has nothing to do with mutant turtles in the sewers who learned kung fu from a mutant rat to fight a villain wearing a suit of knives. No, the TMNT are as ingrained in our imagination as any other 20th century commercial institution at this point, and if we're seeing the film at all, they've already got us in the theater—we've bought the premise like we've bought our ticket. Rather, this new TMNT suffers from the other, worse kind of suspension of disbelief: Filmgoers are asked to turn off their brain, ignore all logic and just accept the fact that every action taken by every character makes no sense at all.
It's starting to look more and more like the new, Michael Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie could be one gigantic exercise in trolling an audience.
The newest evidence of that comes from the casting department. Apparently Jackass star and former Duke of Hazzard Johnny Knoxville will be the voice of Leonardo and Tony Shaloub, who played the title character on Monk for eight seasons, will be Splinter.
I don't know, you guys. I'm just reporting it.
Photos of toys from the new, Michael Bay-produced, Jonathan Liebesman-directed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie have been hard to come by, considering all the heavy security at Toy Fair 2014 last month.
So it looks like, at least for now, we're just going to have to settle for the cake topper versions of Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo and Raphael. Are you ready to see some plastic turtles who are wearing shoes? Click on through.
Since essentially the very moment that the Michael Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was public knowledge, it's been an object of intense fan skepticism. Would the characters look weird, what with their strange new origin story? What will the CGI/live action hybrid look like in action?
Well, there are now actual images of character designs for the turtles and a heavily-armored Shredder from the Jonathan Liebesman-directed movie in their pixel-perfect glory. Judge for yourself.
The new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, which is set to be produced by Michael Bay, directed by Wrath of the Titans' Jonathan Liebesman and star Megan Fox (apparently as April O'Neil) has cast its first turtle: Alan Ritchson, who can be seen in this fall's The Hunger Games: Catching Fire, will portray Raphael, De
If you were one of the many Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fans outraged and appalled not only by plans to turn the giant pizza-eating martial artist reptiles into alien giant pizza-eating martial artist reptiles as part of their upcoming live-action movie reboot, but also by executive producer Michael Bay's suggestion to "take a breath and chill," then I've got some good news and some bad news for you. The good news:
Previews: Vertigo has new previews for its March debuts Fairest, Saucer Country, Dominique Laveau: Voodo Child and The New Deadwardians.
TV: Actress Susanna Thompson has been cast as Green Arrow's mother in The CW's "Arrow" pilot and Katie Cassidy (Gossip Girl) has signed to play Dinah "Laurel" Lance (no word on whether she'll double as Black Canary).
Movies: Jonathan Liebesman (Wrath of the Titans, Battle: Los Angeles) is in talks to di