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New ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Does The Impossible: Makes Other TMNT Movies Look Good [Review]

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It takes almost toxic levels of suspension of disbelief to make it through the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot, the fifth and worst entry in the film franchise based on the pop culture phenomenon originally created by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird. That suspension of disbelief has nothing to do with mutant turtles in the sewers who learned kung fu from a mutant rat to fight a villain wearing a suit of knives. No, the TMNT are as ingrained in our imagination as any other 20th century commercial institution at this point, and if we're seeing the film at all, they've already got us in the theater—we've bought the premise like we've bought our ticket. Rather, this new TMNT suffers from the other, worse kind of suspension of disbelief: Filmgoers are asked to turn off their brain, ignore all logic and just accept the fact that every action taken by every character makes no sense at all.

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Plot Is Overrated: ‘Transformers Vs. G.I. Joe’ Cartoonist Tom Scioli Reviews ‘Transformers: Age of Extinction’

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I love my job. I make Transformers vs. G.I.Joe comics on a monthly basis (with the help of my co-writer John Barber). As part of due diligence, it's my duty to see Transformers: Age of Extinction. My ticket is a business expense. I'm making my comic not just for fans of Transformers and G.I.Joe, but for the rest of planet Earth, too. As a Transformers author I need to know how the larger world percieves Transformers so that I can play up to certain expectations and run counter to preconceived notions. In that capacity, I documented my observations about the film.

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New ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Trailer Comes With Splinter Voice, Robo-Shredder And Whoopi [Video]

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The latest trailer for producer the Michael Bay-produced, Jonathan Liebesman-directed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles gives us the most clarity we've seen yet on the new film based on on Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird’s enduringly popular characters. While fans may never accept the lusciously lipped, Shrek-like designs for the TMNT, some may be relieved to learn the apparent fact that the Japanese villain Shredder will not be played by the distinctly non-Japanese William Fichtner, as previously reported.

No, now the Shredder is a robot.

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New ‘Transformers: Age Of Extinction’ Trailer Brings Hope Of Human Eradication At Last

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Paramount Pictures

You can tell Michael Bay has had enough of entertainment websites ragging on his movies because a new trailer for Transformers: Age of Extinction has just arrived online while the civilized world is meant to be asleep, dreaming of a better world where voice actor Peter Cullen isn't made to read lines that make him sound like some genocidal grandpa. Take that, haters!

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The ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Movie Gets Weirder With Johnny Knoxville As Leonardo And Tony Shaloub As Splinter

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MTV/USA Network

It's starting to look more and more like the new, Michael Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie could be one gigantic exercise in trolling an audience.

The newest evidence of that comes from the casting department. Apparently Jackass star and former Duke of Hazzard Johnny Knoxville will be the voice of Leonardo and Tony Shaloub, who played the title character on Monk for eight seasons, will be Splinter.

I don't know, you guys. I'm just reporting it.

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Slapping Is The Right Of All Sentient Beings In New ‘Transformers: Age Of Extinction’ Trailer [Video]

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Paramount Pictures

The moviegoing public is pretty divided when it comes to Michael Bay's cinematic Autobot Vs. Deception saga, but the first 35-second trailer for Trans4mers: Age of Extinction released during the Super Bowl managed to unite humanity in its (until then unrealized) love of seeing a sword-toting Optimus Prime ride the tyrannosaurus Transformer Grimlock like a common steed. For that glimmering two seconds it seemed like the movie would offer at least one shining moment worth the cost of admission (or a six-pack of something cheap and the cost of a Redbox rental five months later). But no! The new full trailer has topped it! How would you like to watch Optimus Prime straight up slap a dinosaur?

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The New Movie ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Crouch For Cakes

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Photos of toys from the new, Michael Bay-produced, Jonathan Liebesman-directed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie have been hard to come by, considering all the heavy security at Toy Fair 2014 last month.

So it looks like, at least for now, we're just going to have to settle for the cake topper versions of Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo and Raphael. Are you ready to see some plastic turtles who are wearing shoes? Click on through.

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Trailer for the Next Terrible ‘Transformers’ Film Features A Robot With Parachutes For Some Reason [Video]

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The Super Bowl commercial for Transformers: Age of Extinction, the fourth film in the Michael Bay led franchise, features, among other ridiculous things, a robot with with machine guns -- seemingly not attached to its body, but actually holding giant machine guns -- while descending from the sky with parachutes. It is ridiculous, but what the hell, watch it below anyway.

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More Images Of Live Action ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Arrive Online, And They Are Slightly Creepy

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Yesterday, a few photos leaked of early designs from the upcoming Michael Bay produced live action Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film. Today, a picture has leaked showing all four turtles, possibly giving us a better idea of what the final design for the characters will be in the movie. And, before we get into anything else, we need to deal with one unavoidable fact: the turtles all have lips, at least two of them have human looking noses, and that is f***ing creepy.

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Live Action ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ And Shredder Movie Designs Surface [UPDATE]

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Since essentially the very moment that the Michael Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was public knowledge, it's been an object of intense fan skepticism. Would the characters look weird, what with their strange new origin story? What will the CGI/live action hybrid look like in action?

Well, there are now actual images of character designs for the turtles and a heavily-armored Shredder from the Jonathan Liebesman-directed movie in their pixel-perfect glory. Judge for yourself.

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