Evil Action Figures Meet Justice Through The Time-Honored Strategy Of Excessive Violence [Video]
The idea of one’s toys coming to life at night is a charming and utterly horrifying staple of children’s stories, but here’s the thing. If you’re a kid who has action figures, then you don’t just have spacemen and cowboys — you have a lot of bad guys. The good guys need someone to fight, after all, so chances are pretty good that your toybox is going to be full of at least a few megalomaniacal snake-themed terrorists and probably a lot of thematic serial killers too. So what happens when they come to life? As it turns out, writer/director Paul Constantakis has the answer in a short film called Villainous.
As much as I can get behind tearing the wings off a Transformer and leaving Darth Vader laying in a beaten heap, I’d be remiss in my duties as the World’s Leading Batmanologist if I didn’t point out that Batman — even a tiny plastic Batman — would never use lethal tactics like hanging the Joker, drowning Cobra Commander or impaling Storm Shadow on his own sword. I am willing, however, to accept that this film takes place in a non-canonical alternate universe in which Batman’s secret identity is That Neighbor Kid From Toy Story.
That said, I can’t help but imagine that this poor kid is going to wake up tomorrow morning and be pretty cheesed off that his formerly Near Mint Sabretooth figure is now full of thumbtack holes. And that’s best case scenario. If his parents walk in to see mutilated Skeletor and Shredder shoved through a framed photo, that poor kid’s going to be seeing the school psychologist for the rest of the year.